Disney and Pixar’s Cars films raise many questions: Where did all the humans go? What brought all those cars to life? Why do they keep making these movies? There are plenty of theories for some of these queries, but there’s one question that’s has long gone unanswered: why are there no motorcycles in this universe of sentient vehicles? It seems we now have the answer. Are you ready to learn the shocking truth about the Cars universe motorcycles?
The reason motorcycles don’t exist in the Cars universe is because the God of Cars who lives in Cars Heaven and created the cars forbids them. Okay, that’s not the reason at all, but that would be pretty wild. The actual reason is tame but amusing, and makes a certain sort of sense. Cars creative director Jay Ward lays it out for you here (via Cinema Blend):
“[I]n Cars 2, we really tried to put in little Vespa scooters for the Italy scenes. The problem is the eyes and the mouth. A motorcycle has one eye. It has a headlight, not headlights. So that’s difficult. Where do you put the eyes when they don’t have a windshield? … And then the mouth is somewhere south of the headlight? It really is difficult to bring a motorcycle to life as a character. With the shape of a car, it’s like the head of a horse, or the head of a dog. It has a long snout, you can put the eyes back in the windshield, and it works very well to emote.”
There you have it – motorcycles would look too horrifying, like Cubist paintings come to life, if they existed in the Cars world. That said, if they want to make Cars 4 and set it on an Island of Misfit Cars, full of weird, misshapen vehicles and motorcycles, I will gladly buy a ticket for that.
Editor’s Note: Though motorcycles may not exist in the Cars universe, keep an eye out in one of the crowd shots of the Cotter Pin bar in Cars 3 during the final race, because you’ll notice a pair of bicycle handles mounted on the wall as if they’re deer antlers. We’re not sure if that means the cars of Cars are hunting vehicles that don’t have engines, but it’s certainly some food for thought.
It’s worth noting that while the extremely talented folks at Pixar have been unable to crack this nut, explosion connoisseur Michael Bay figured it out for Transformers: The Last Knight with the character of Squeeks, an Autobot that’s also a Vespa scooter and kind of looks like another Pixar character, Wall-E.
Obviously, the only solution to this mess is to have a Transformers/Cars crossover, which will probably be big and loud but also make a lot of money. If this happens, I want a cut.
The motorcycle-free Cars 3 will be released on digital October 24 and Blu-ray November 7, 2017.